Children grow up quickly, and their interests and needs change quickly. Yesterday it was important for a child to be the first in class, to get only straight A’s, but as a teenager, he or she is increasingly talking about the meaninglessness of learning and achievement in general.
In the transition period, the child’s senses are heightened, he begins to reconsider his goals, easily succumbs to negativity and tends to dramatize failures and criticism of his address. As a consequence, he loses motivation, as he simply does not believe in his own success the same way an adult stops believing in his betting skills after a few losses at this sportsbook. Depending on your personality type, you can gently guide your child, help him regain his goal and achieve it with ease.
Where to Start
Teenagers are skeptical of direct help from adults. At this age, it’s normal to think that parents don’t understand and will never be able to understand them. The main factors that cause academic performance to decline and motivation to disappear:
- New hobbies and hobbies that are more interesting to the child than textbooks and homework.
- Stress related to the fact that the child is afraid of his own future.
- Cold relations with peers.
- Overload of additional classes, tutors and sections.
- Boredom from monotony and routine.
- Conflicts with teachers.
The first thing to start with is to determine what factor your child is facing. The next step is to correct the situation softly and gently. If the child has a new interest to which he devotes all his time, give him the opportunity to realize himself. If the hobby is, say, drawing – offer him or her an art school or courses, noting that if the child wants to tie his or her life to this hobby, he or she will need to go to college anyway, and therefore should not completely forget about his or her studies.
The stress of the uncertainty of the future and the reluctance to take on adult responsibility is solved more gradually. You will need to have patience. Do not downplay your feelings and fears, by no means ridicule them, but on the contrary, try to show by personal example that adult life may not be devoid of problems, but it is not as terrible and frightening as it may seem.
When you find the reason for the decrease in motivation, you can begin to help your child overcome the problem and regain their optimism and desire to achieve their goals.
Personality Types and Their Impact on Motivation
Everyone is born with a certain predisposition to a particular pattern of behavior. From early childhood, you can notice interesting patterns, features in the child’s personality. For example, your child can talk to your interlocutor in such a way that you yourself begin to believe in his/her words, realizing that what he/she said is an invention.
Depending on the personality type, you can further encourage your child to work on himself or herself and even regain motivation.
It’s important for a leader to concentrate on everyone around him. It’s important for him to be admired for his achievements, his way of life and way of thinking to be contagious, to be first and only in everything and always. It may seem that a child with this type of personality would have no problem motivating himself, but leaders more often than others burn out before reaching the goal. High productivity of leaders is associated with high self-esteem, if it’s hurt, the motivation will fade rapidly.
What to Do
Form a correct cause-and-effect relationship. More often tell the child that other people’s opinions are just their opinions, the result of their personal negative experiences, and only the child decides whether or not to take taunts and advice personally. Often leaders can’t relax and burn out because they think they are only loved for their accomplishments. Try to highlight more often the good qualities of the teenager that are not related to achieving goals.
This type of child has a natural charisma and innate entrepreneurial spirit. His favorite phrase is, “What’s in it for me?” and his favorite behavioral strategy is to turn on all his talents and knowledge only if gifts or valuable things that might interest him loom on the horizon.
What to Do
Never encourage your child with gifts for anything. Gifts, new things, and payment for courses are a spiritual impulse and a desire to please, which should not be presented as a gift for convenient behavior. Barter relationships in the family – a strict taboo, because over the years it will only get worse. You can help such a child through his larger motivation.
For example, if the child dreams of fame and fame, tell about the direct correlation of good studies and achievements in life. Also, remember about the education of the individual moral and spiritual traits. The material isn’t the only thing he should be interested in.
This child easily understands new information, does fantastic analysis, is diligent and patient. Personality type “doer” can be a great student, but only if he follows the system. This type is difficult to work with creativity, haste and a quick change of circumstances.
What to Do
Help your child to build his personal system, a plan that he will clearly follow. This type of personality will be suitable for a daily regimen in which he can manage all his affairs and methodically move from one goal to another. Offer to detail all the benefits of learning, so the teenager will see all the benefits of knowledge, and will gradually regain motivation. Also try to pay more attention to his key points of character and praise him for them: hard work, thoughtfulness and so on.
Your child can combine several personality types and change it depending on the situation and with the passage of time. The main thing is to always express your approval of positive changes in your teenager’s life, his aspirations and good wishes.